I had a friend of mine, a recent mother, describe for me what she thought her vision of being a mom was going to be, as “rosy, perfect, Donna Reed, Doris Day, with the kitchen overflowing with bowls of ripe organic fruits, and an angelic child, who sleeps through the night…instead – like most – of us her bubble burst with the reality of poop decorated shirts, never having time to shower, sleepless nights of never-ending hiccups of gas pains, or God knows what, and the only “me time” occasionally caught on the toilet!
Dads, I am sure had similar visions of idyllic wife-child-husband dynamic, and also wake to the harsh reality that parenting is no picnic! But that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it – ants and all! Here are some ways not to make you the perfect parent, but to help make parenting the hardest job, you will ever love!
If you’ve heard these kinds of words before, you can always hear them again and again, because these are the bones and blood of becoming the parent you want to be:
“If I had my child to raise over again…I’d build self-esteem first and the house later, I’d finger paint more and point the finger less, I would do less correcting and more connecting, I’d take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes, I would care to know less and know to care more, I’d take more hikes and fly more kites, I’d stop playing serious and seriously play, I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars, I’d do more hugging and less tugging, I’d see the oak tree in the acorn more often, I would be firm less often and affirm much more, I’d model less about the love of power and more about the power of love……”
I have heard it said that “there is no magic to being a great parent, but, indeed there is. The magic in becoming the parent you want to be is just to believe that you are, believe in yourself and see life with the eyes of your heart. When you do that, you have magic and you can make anything happen. You see something beautiful and magical in everything. And that, as a matter of fact, is just the way your children see life!